“Derice Bannock: [Derice sees Sanka’s breath in the cold Calgary air] Sanka mon, whatcha smoking?
Sanka Coffie: I’m not smoking, I’m breathing!”
— Derice Bannock, Cool Runnings
“’Cool Runnings’ means ‘Peace Be The Journey.’”
— Derice Bannock, Cool Runnings
“Junior Bevill: Seeming to you nobody likes us?
Yul Brenner: We’re different. People are always afraid of what’s different.”
— Lynn Siefert, Michael Goldberg, Tommy Swerdlow, Cool Runnings
“Irv: Hi, I’d like to register for the tryouts.
Registration Official: What country?
Irv: Uh… [clears throat] Jamaica.
Registration Official: [smiles] What country?
Irv: Jamaica.
Registration Official: [stops smiling and enters the information] Huh, what do you know? A Jamaican bobsled team.”
— Irving ‘Irv’ Blitzer, Cool Runnings
“This is what it’s all about, this is whether you win or lose the race, right here in the push start! This is where you’re gonna practice, right here, right here in a Volkswagen!”
— Irving ‘Irv’ Blitzer, Cool Running
“Winning a bobsled race is about one thing: the push-start. Now I know you dainty, little track stars think you’re fast. Well, heh, let’s see how fast you are when you push a six-hundred pound sled. Now a respectable start-time is five-point-seven seconds. If you speed demons can’t whip off an even six flat, you have a better chance of becoming a barbershop quartet.”
— Irving ‘Irv’ Blitzer, Cool Runnings
“It’s not so much the heat, it’s the humidity that’ll kill you.”
— Irving ‘Irv’ Blitzer, Cool Runnings
“All right, Derice. Let me lay out some difficulties for you. Snow: you don’t have any. It’s nine hundred degrees out there. Time: you don’t have any. The Olympics are in three months. And me: you don’t have me. As far as I’m concerned, the sport of bobsledding no longer exists. I don’t want to do it, I don’t want to coach it, and most of all, and I mean most of all, I don’t want to be within two thousand miles of anybody who does. Now did you follow all that?”
— Irving ‘Irv’ Blitzer, Cool Runnings
“Irwin Blitzer: Gentlemen, a bobsled is a simple thing.
Man: Yeah, so’s a toilet!”
— Irving ‘Irv’ Blitzer, Cool Runnings
“Oh, yeah, just one little drawback to this delightful winter sport. The high-speed crash. Ooh! That hurt. Always remember, your bones will not break in a bobsled. No, no, no. They shatter.”
— Irving ‘Irv’ Blitzer, Cool Runnings
“Irv: I told the owner of the bar that these guys were mentally disturbed, so he’s not going to press any charges.
Sanka Coffie: Yeah! Sled god does it again!
Irv: Just shut up, Sanka.”
— Irving ‘Irv’ Blitzer, Cool Runnings
“Josef Grul: Hey, Jamaica! Watch out for Number Twelve turn. Scary, ja?
Derice Bannock: What’s his problem?
Irv: He’s Josef Grul. He’s one of the best drivers in the world.
Yul Brenner: Yeah, he’s one of the biggest ASSHOLES in the world, too.”
— Irving ‘Irv’ Blitzer, Cool Runnings
“Come on, Kurt, what you’re doing here is wrong, and you know it! Now if this is about you and me, let’s lay it all down now. All right, sixteen years ago, I made the biggest mistake of my life: I cheated. I was stupid. I embarrassed myself, I embarrassed my country, my friends, my family, my teammates, [points to Kurt] and my coach. Hey, if it’s revenge you want, take it. Go ahead, disqualify me, banish me! Do whatever you want, but do it to me! It was me who let you down, Kurt! It wasn’t my guys! They’ve done everything you’ve asked of them! And they did it with all of you laughing in their face. Hey, it doesn’t matter tomorrow if they come in first or fiftieth. Those guys have earned the right to walk into that stadium and wave their nation’s flag. That’s the single greatest honor an athlete can ever have. That’s what the Olympics are all about. Sixteen years ago I forgot that. Don’t you go and do the same.”
— Irving ‘Irv’ Blitzer, Cool Runnings
“Our Father, who art in Calgary, Bobsled be thy name. Thy kingdom come, gold medals won, on Earth as it is in Turn Seven. With Liberty and Justice for Jamaica and Haile Selassie. Amen.”
— Irving ‘Irv’ Blitzer, Cool Runnings
“Derice Bannock: Hey, Coach.
Irv: Yeah?
Derice Bannock: I have to ask you a question.
Irv: Sure.
Derice Bannock: But you don’t have to answer if you don’t want to. I mean, I want you to, but if you can’t, I understand.
Irv: You wanna know why I cheated, right?
Derice Bannock: Yes, I do.
Irv: That’s a fair question. It’s quite simple, really. I had to win. You see, Derice, I’d made winning my whole life. And when you make winning your whole life, you have to keep on winning, no matter what. You understand that?
Derice Bannock: No, I don’t understand. You won two gold medals. You had it all.
Irv: Derice, a gold medal is a wonderful thing. But if you’re not enough without one, you’ll never be enough with one.
Derice Bannock: Hey, coach… how will I know if I’m enough?
Irv: When you cross that finish line tomorrow, you’ll know.”
— Irving ‘Irv’ Blitzer, Cool Runnings
“British Official: We must also be concerned about the potential for embarrassment.
Irv: Oh, pardon me. I didn’t realize that four black guys in a bobsled could make you blush.”
— Irving ‘Irv’ Blitzer, Cool Runnings
“Yul Brenner: [the guys start climbing into the bobsled] Don’t touch me!
Sanka Coffie: Hey, Baldie, get off my foot!
Yul Brenner: Don’t touch me!”
— Sanka Coffie, Cool Runnings
“Derice Bannock: You know, when the Swiss want to ge…
Sanka Coffie: Ah, will you shut up about the damn Swiss! I mean, it was all that ‘eins zwei drei’ nonsense that got us all nervous in the first place.
Derice Bannock: Hey, man, look here, I’m just trying to get us off on the right foot.
Sanka Coffie: Well, the right foot for us is not the Swiss foot. I mean, come on, Derice, we can’t be copying nobody else’s style. We have our own style.
Derice Bannock: Kissing an egg is no kind of style. It’s the Olympics here, it’s no stupid push-cart derby. [Long pause]
Sanka Coffie: Let me tell you something, rasta, I didn’t come up here to forget who I am and where I come from.
Derice Bannock: Neither did I. I’m just trying to be the best I can be.
Sanka Coffie: So am I, and the best I can be is Jamaican. Look, Derice, I’ve known you since Julie Jeffreys asked to see your ding-a-ling, and I’m telling you as a friend… if we look Jamaican, walk Jamaican, talk Jamaican and IS Jamaican, then we sure as hell better bobsled Jamaican.”
— Sanka Coffie, Cool Runnings
“Sanka Coffie: So, let’s talk about this billsled team.
Derice Bannock: No, bobsled team.
Sanka Coffie: Whoever. Now, about the Wheaties box. I’m gunna be on it myself, right?
Derice Bannock: No, mon, you gunna be on it with me.”
— Sanka Coffie, Cool Runnings
“[Sanka reveals a hot water bottle nestled under his shirt]
Derice Bannock: I can’t believe you’re still cold, mon.
Sanka Coffie: Cold? I’m freezing my royal Rastafarian nay-nays off!”
— Sanka Coffie, Cool Runnings
“[about to be pushed off start]
Sanka Coffie: Oh, wait. Coach, I gotta go. You know?
Irv: Hold it.
Sanka Coffie: Hold it?
Irv: Hold it.
Sanka Coffie: Hold it?
Irv: Yeah, hold it!
Sanka Coffie: But, Coach, I can’t hold it. We’re not bobsledding yet.
Irv: Oh, yes we are. [pushes them off]
Sanka Coffie: Coach… Coach! [the bobsled picks up speed and careens down the track] Coach! COACH! Aaahh! Slow it down! Slow it—slow it down! Oh, my God! Oh, Derice, oh, Derice I hate you! I hate you! I hate you!”
— Sanka Coffie, Cool Runnings
“Sanka Coffie: Hey! Hey! What you doin?
Derice Bannock: This is what the Swiss do to psych themselves up!
Sanka Coffie: They also make them little pocket knives, too, but I don’t see you doing that!”
— Sanka Coffie, Cool Runnings
“Sanka Coffie: Hey Derice! Ya dead?
Derice Bannock: No mon, I’m not dead. We have to finish the race…”
— Sanka Coffie, Cool Runnings
“[Pre-race cheer]
Kids: Who’s the captain of our crew? Who’s a friend to me and you? Kinda nice, good-looking too! Sanka, Sanka, yay, Sanka!
Sanka Coffie: Ha ha ha! Get back to work!
Derice Bannock: Who’s the big hot bag of air, who doesn’t have to comb his hair? Who doesn’t bathe and doesn’t care, Sanka, Sanka, yay, Sanka!”
— Sanka Coffie, Cool Runnings
“Yul Brenner: Say whatever it is that you want ’cause you’re just like every other fool on the island. You’re going nowhere, Sanka, and you’re thrilled to death about it. But you see me? You see me? I’m different, ’cause I know exactly where I’m going and after I, Yul Brenner, win the Olympics and become famous I’m going to leave the island and live right down there. [Pulls out picture of Buckingham Palace]
Sanka Coffie: [laughing]
Yul Brenner: What are you laughing about? What are you laughing about?
Sanka Coffie: That’s Buckingham Palace. You plan on living there, you’re going to have to marry the Queen.
Junior Bevill: Yul, that’s where the Queen of England lives.
Sanka Coffie: Face it, Yul Brenner you can start calling yourself Madonna but you’re still going to end up in an outhouse shanty like every other dock-working nobody.
Junior Bevill: Mm, says who?
Sanka Coffie: Says me, rich boy. What do you know about it?
Junior Bevill: Well, I know my father started off in a one room hut. Now he lives in one of the biggest homes in Kingston.
Sanka Coffie: Well, he ain’t your father.
Junior Bevill: He doesn’t have to be. All he has to do is know what he wants and work hard for it. And if he wants it bad enough, he’ll get it. Look, believe me, Sanka the more Yul Brenners we got making it in this world the better off this world will be, especially for Jamaicans. Go ahead, Yul Brenner. Go get your palace.”
— Sanka Coffie, Cool Runnings
“Sanka Coffie: ‘Nuff people say, you know they can’t believe, Jamaica, we have a bobsled team. We have the one Derice…
Derice Bannock: And the one Junior…
Junior Bevill: Yu— [Yul gives him a ‘don’t even think about it’ look] … Sanka!
Derice Bannock: The fastest of the fastest of Jamaican sprinters…
Sanka Coffie, Derice Bannock, Junior Bevill: Go to Olympics, fight for Jamaica!”
— Sanka Coffie, Cool Runnings
“What I am saying to you, is that you are the kind of club-toting, raw-meat-eating, Me-Tarzan-You-Jane-ing, big, bald bubblehead that can only count to ten if he’s barefoot or wearing sandals.”
— Sanka Coffie, Cool Runnings
“Irv: You see Sanka, the driver has to work harder than anyone. He’s the first to show up, and the last to leave. When his buddies are all out drinking beer, he’s up in his room studying pictures of turns. You see, a driver must remain focused one hundred percent at all times. Not only is he responsible for knowing every inch of every course he races, he’s also responsible for the lives of the other men in the sled. Now do you want that responsibility?
Sanka Coffie: I say we make Derice the driver.
Irv: So do I, Sanka. So do I.”
— Sanka Coffie, Cool Runnings
“All I’m saying, mon, is if we walk Jamaican, talk Jamaican, and is Jamaican, then we sure as hell better bobsled Jamaican.”
— Sanka Coffie, Cool Runnings
“Sanka Coffie: The key elements to a successful sled team are a steady driver, and three strong runners to push off down the ice. Ice? Ice!
Derice Bannock: Well, it’s kind of a winter sport, you know.
Sanka Coffie: You mean winter, as in ice?
Derice Bannock: Possibly.
Sanka Coffie: You mean winter, as in igloos and Eskimos and penguins and ice?
Derice Bannock: Maybe.
Sanka Coffie: See ya!”
— Sanka Coffie, Cool Runnings
“Derice Bannock: You don’t see the Swiss team fighting, do you? You don’t see the Swiss team drinking and carrying on and such.
Sanka Coffie: And you don’t see the Swiss team smiling, neither. In fact, if one of those Swiss boys ever come across a pretty girl, he probably yell, ‘eins, zwei, drei’ and try to push her down some ice. [laughs]”
— Sanka Coffie, Cool Runnings
“Yul Brenner: How about I beat your butt right now?
Sanka Coffie: How about I draw a line down the middle of your head so it looks like a butt?”
— Sanka Coffie, Cool Runnings
“Sanka Coffie: So what are we gunna name the sled?
Junior Bevill: How about ‘Tallulah?’
Sanka Coffie: Tallulah! Hahaha! Tallulah! Sounds like a two-dollar hooker! Where you come up with that?
Junior Bevill: That’s my mother’s name.”
— Sanka Coffie, Cool Runnings
“Sanka Coffie: I’m the driver.
Irv: You’re not. You’re the brakeman.
Sanka Coffie: You don’t understand, I am Sanka Coffie, I am the best pushcart driver in all of Jamaica! I must drive! Do you dig where I’m coming from?
Irv: Yeah, I dig where you’re coming from.
Sanka Coffie: Good.
Irv: Now dig where I’m coming from. I’m coming from two gold medals. I’m coming from nine world records in both the two- and four-man events. I’m coming from ten years of intense competition with the best athletes in the world.
Sanka Coffie: That’s a hell of a place to be coming from!”
— Sanka Coffie, Cool Runnings
“Feel the rhythm! Feel the rhyme! Get on up, it’s bobsled time! Cool Runnings!”
— Sanka Coffie, Cool Runnings
“Yul Brenner: Look in the mirror and tell me what you see!
Junior Bevill: I see Junior.
Yul Brenner: You see Junior? Well, let me tell you what I see. I see pride! I see power! I see a badass mother who don’t take no crap off of nobody!”
— Yul Brenner, Cool Runnings